Re-thinking Aids

J. G. Isles – MMMMustard Got Lost-An Excerpt from The Great Pumpkin Letters

Chief Crazy Captain Christo was trying to get over his shyness in public. Ever since he quit buying London Bridges from some Computer Hacker from Nigeria Histereeryia, he was having a rough time of it back home in Pumpkinville. He actually went so far as to Phone a friend from the Grateful Thyme Warp. You know how it is when a long lost friend’s voice can zap you out of an inconvenient conspiracy theory. Well to catch you up to speed, we join the conversation in progress as it is going down the Pikes Peak. You see, Chief Crazy Captain Christo phoned his long lost buddy, Zebulon Pike. After Zebulon’s death a long time ago, a slow burning dagger had been inching closer to the Good Chief Crazy Captain Christo’s heart. Just hearing Zebulon’s voice, made the sting of the dagger feel icy cold as if to not exist. Here is the conversation in it’s ragged glory, word by word. Zebulon Pikes name has been changed to Zapoto Gold or ZA’-GO. Chief Crazy Captain Christo’s name has been changed to T- Hata- Weigh or THATAWAY. So ready set go. AZ-MA walks into the private set of circumstances. AZ-MA is played by Rob Zombie.

AZ-MA- ” Quiet on the Set and Action…” ( Bang your Head!! Metal Health will drive you mad..”)

THATAWAY- ” Hey Rob Zombie, this is a private phone call so please don’t keep this in the script.”  Read more...